The Ronin Warriors' Bustrip
by dumplingpriestess
Summary: The Ronin Warriors are invited to the Mt. Fuji Hot Springs Resort. Based on the Fushigi Yuugi OAV Ladies' Hot Springs Chapter. Please R/R!! *CHAPTER 6 UP!* THIS IS THE EMOTIONAL LAST CHAPTER!! Warriors and warlords in dresses!
1. The Dark Warlords Take Over

NOTE: This is a parody based on the Fushigi Yuugi "Ladies Hot Springs Chapter: The Forbidden Bus Trip." That's the one where they're all in buses, etc. (by the way, that's my favorite episode(s)). I use the American names, and I took liberties on developing some of the lesser characters. Just in case it's not obvious, Rowan is my favorite. At the time when I was writing this, I did not know warriors said something different to activate their armors. (It all sounded the same to me!) I left them the same, anyway. Hope you like it!

***All characters (both Ronin Warriors and Fushigi Yuugi) are **not** my original creations***

The four dark warlords and their master stood on the side of the road, at the corner of first and twenty third, waiting for their ride.

"Are you sure it's coming? Dais asked.

Cale pulled out an elaborately made invitation. "It say's right here," he said, pointing to a spot on the note, "meet at the corner of first and twenty-third street at 10:00 A.M. Wait for a bus to transport you."

"Oooh, I hope it's one of those charter buses with the nice plush seats," said Dais, who had a knack for sometimes sounding too feminine.

"Transport us where?" Sekhmet asked.

"To the Mt. Fuji Hot Springs Resort," Cale read from the invitation.

"Oooh, a resort," said Dais; "I've always wanted to go to one of those."

"Do you think the Ronin Warriors got an invitation too?" Anubis asked as he crossed his fingers for good luck (out of eyesight, of course.)

Cale looked up at the invite. "Probably. They always get in the way."

"Goody!" Anubis shouted. Maybe Ryo would let him sit next to him at dinner...

Anubis's thoughts were interrupted as he realized everyone was staring at him. Tulpa's eyes glowed red. 

Anubis cleared his throat. "I mean...good. Then we'll be able to finally finish those Ronin rodents."

Tulpa's eyes flashed red. "We must destroy the Ronin Warriors. I need their armors."

"But Master Tulpa, the Ronin Warriors aren't that bad..." Anubis began, forgetting that he was supposed to be pro-evil.

"Anubis, I feel you need a dark energy boost. Netherspirit! Come forth and give Anubis more dark energy!"

A Netherspirit manifested himself and threw Anubis a canned drink. Anubis looked at the label, which read "Dark Energy Boost: Raise Your Negative Powers By 100! Vanilla flavor." Anubis popped the top and swallowed the whole thing in one gulp. Then he grinned a very evil grin.

"Now I feel like I could kill a thousand Ronin Warriors!" he yelled in mock battle cry.

"Uh...there are only five warriors..." Cale corrected.

"I know that! Shut up!" Anubis yelled, turning red.

At that moment, an old rundown bus puttered up to the corner and stopped. The doors opened. The driver peered at them.

"Y'all gettin' in?" the bus driver asked in a very southern accent.

"Y'all?!" Sekhmet exclaimed, clearly disgusted. "Where do you think we're from, the backwoods?"

"Y'all gettin' in or not?"

Cale looked at the beautifully scripted invitation, then at the decrepit bus. "No, we're waiting for another bus."

The bus driver nodded. "This 'ere bus is the one y'all be wantin', boys."

"Excuse me?" Dais asked, having trouble understanding the driver's thick drawl.

"I was told that tuday at 10:00, five men in armer would be at this 'ere stop. Well, 'ere it be 10:00 and y'all got armer on an' all..."

"Who told you this?!" Sekhmet demanded.

"Hey," the bus driver said, ignoring Sekhmet completely. He looked suspiciously at Dais and his armor. "I didn't know yer armer would be all spread out like that. Y'all won't be able to fit through that there door. Looks like we'll be usin' the wheelchair access to get y'all in."

"I don't want to get on there!" Dais cried. "That man scares me!"

"Get on!" Tulpa roared, his eyes flashing blood red. He shocked the four warlords with dark electrical energy. "We'll take over the bus."

Twenty Minutes Later:

"Just make yerselfs comfortable," the bus driver said, smiling. "My bus is yer bus."

The five looked at each other and grinned evily. Then they all sat down, each one taking up at least two seats.

Anubis and Cale found themselves situated opposite an old woman who was hard of hearing and was suffering from vision loss. She smiled sweetly at them.

"Why hello there, boys. Where are you all going on this fine day?"

Anubis made his scariest face. "We are going to kill the Ronin Warriors!"

"You're going to a costume party?" the old woman said. "How wonderful! and who are you supposed to be?"

Anubis stood and proudly announced his position. "I am Anubis, Dark Warlord of Cruelty!"

"A clown? How original? I remember when I was little there was a clown at a party I went to..."

Anubis collapsed from shock. That woman didn't care that he was a dark warlord. Cale grinned. His turn.

"I am Cale, Dark Warlord of Corruption! I will--"

"A bunny rabbit?" The old woman patted Cale on the leg. "You're adorable. I remember when I was little I had a bunny rabbit and..."

"Help us, Tulpa!" Cale and Anubis cried as they were forced to listen to the old woman reminiscing.

"Now we take over," Tulpa said, after deciding that he had also had enough of the woman's blabbering.

"Netherspirits!" he cried. "Come and fill this bus with dark energy!"

The bus picked up speed. Pedestrians and other vehicles were forced off the road and sidewalks as the bus careened down the road at breakneck speeds. Screams were heard. Bands of strange light radiated from the windows.

"Demon soldiers!" Sekhmet ordered after the Evil Dynasty had taken over the bus, "track down the Ronin Warriors!"

Well? What do you think? Good? Bad? I would really appreciate it if you reviewed my work. I wrote this a couple of years ago, found it recently, and thought I'd post it. Don't worry (or worry if you fear my twisted humor...), there's more to come.


	2. Problems With Armor, Among Other Things....

Happy New Year!! In this part, the Ronin Warriors make their grand appearance! So, sit back and enjoy the next part in The Ronin Warriors' Bustrip.

***All characters, both Ronin Warriors and Fushigi Yuugi, are **not** my original creations***

The five Ronin Warriors, White Blaze, and a sleeping Yulie sat in a red jeep that sped along the winding road at a terrifying pace. Inside, Mia and Rowan sat in the front. Rowan lay stretched out over the dashboard, taking full advantage of the space the author had written in for him. The back, however, was slightly cramped.

"Why did we choose Kentou, of all people, to sit on our laps? He's so heavy!" Cye complained (in his British accent.)

"Well, if we got a bigger car--" Sage began.

"It's a jeep, Sage." Mia corrected.

"Well, if you want to get technical, it's really a ..."

"Jeep! It's a jeep!" Mia shot back. "And it's my jeep, so if you don't like it, then get out!"

"Kentou, you big oaf, get off of me!" Cye cried.

Kentou shifted restlessly, causing a huge scratch to appear in Ryo's armor. Ryo sighed. He had just finished polishing his armor that morning. It had taken all night, then fatty over there couldn't keep still...

"You lookin' for a fight? HUH?! Answer me!" Kentou bellowed into Sage and Cye's ears. suddenly a loud growl was heard.

"Kentou, that your stomach?" Rowan called from the front (in his cute Australian accent. I'm not biased, really, I swear.)

White Blaze growled threateningly. The humans kept shifting, disturbing his sleep. It was bad enough that he had to aid them in battle, now he had to put up with their antics? The loud-mouthed one in orange...he would be eaten first...and what a large meal it would be. White Blaze's mouth salivated at the thought.

Mia glanced back and sighed at the stupidity assembled there. The "warriors" had insisted on wearing their armor in the car; "it was more intimidating to passengers in other vehicles." If they happened to get into an accident, and she was lucky, she'd be able to identify the smashed bodies by their colorful armor. She looked over to Rowan, who was using the side mirror to look at himself. He was searching fro that perfect "hair-over-the-face-yet-still-able-to-see" look. At least he had enough common sense to not have his armor on. Mia frowned. Maybe she should stop throwing herself at Ryo and try hitting on the intelligent on of the group.

"Hey guys, isn't it crowded back there with your armor on? Why don't you get out of it?" she asked.

"Yeah, it is a little cramped," Ryo commented as he narrowly missed getting one of his eyes gouged out by one of Kentou's helmet horns.

"But Mia," Kentou cried, "the armors are stuck on us. And I haven't found any zippers or buttons that might help us get out of it!"

The car fell silent. Everyone stared at Kentou, who had just proven to be the epitome of stupidity.

"Don't worry guys," Kentou added, further digging himself into a hole, "I'll find them soon."

Kentou shifted again as he searched for the buttons and/or zippers. Metal scraping against metal was heard. Everyone cringed at the sound. The three warriors in the back looked down and found a new scratch on each of their armors. Ryo then decided to take charge and spoke.

"Rowan, give Kentou something to eat."

Rowan, who had full control of the snack bag, leaned forward and dug around in a paper bag. Finding an open package of Ahoy Chips (tm), he tossed it back. Kentou caught the bag with both hands. Pulling it close to him, he nibbled on the cookies quietly and became still. 

"Now, power down!" Ryo said. "Jin Tao!" Several minutes passed, and nothing happened.

"Wait, Ryo, isn't it Tao Jin?!" Rowan asked.

Dark blue energy collected around Rowan. Floral cloth unfurled and Rowan's armor appeared on him.

"Shoot! I guess that was the power up saying." He looked at his armor, which was now making his shotgun seat very uncomfortable. "Stupid strata armor," he muttered.

Meanwhile, the boys in the back flailed around, trying to extract themselves from the floral cloth that had appeared during Rowan's power up.

"Oh, now I remember; nij oat!" Ryo announced, pulling a hot pink floral pattern off his helmet.

"Is that some sort of Pig Latin?" Sage asked.

"No, it's Tao Jin! backwards," Ryo replied.

Red energy collected around Ryo's armor, re-energizing him. The jeep began to get very warm.

"Ryo, contain your armor! It's burning me!" Cye whined.

"Alright, now that we remember the saying, can we power down?" Sage asked.

"Armor of Wildfire, NIJ OAT!" 

Ryo's armor disappeared, but it took several minutes and several different screen shots before he was back in regular clothing.

The other four warriors stared at him blankly.

"What's wrong? Aren't you guys going to power down? It will really give us more room," Ryo asked innocently.

"Are you done stealing the show?" Cye asked sardonically.

"Technically, this is a fanfic..." Sage corrected.

"Be quiet, Sage! All you ever do is correct people!" Cye retorted.

"But I don't correct--"

"See?! there! You just did it!'

"Did what?"

"There! You did it again!"

"Cye, did wha--?"

"I want milk!" a voice, who had been silent for some time, announced.

"Kentou?" Ryo asked.

"Milk!"

"It's the Law of the Hungry Mouse..." Rowan drawled.

"What?!" cried the three non-large warriors.

"Haven't you ever read the book If You Give A Mouse A Cookie...? It was my favorite book when I was little..."

Ryo made a face. "Rowan, that was too much information."

"Give me milk!"

"I see," said Sage, over Kentou's incessant bellowing. "If you give a mouse a cookie, it'll want a glass of milk."

Rowan nodded, glad someone was finally smart enough to reach his higher level thinking. Maybe Sage wasn't so bad...

"I wouldn't consider Kentou a mouse, though," Cye said, interrupting Rowan's thoughts.

"Still, it will all end the same way. Kentou'll drink the milk, then he'll ask for..." Rowan began.

"It's the genius convention. And today's topic is 'Kentou: mouse or lard ass?'" Mia muttered to herself, a touch of annoyance appearing in her voice.

"MILK!"

"Ryo," Yulie said, waking up from his afternoon nap, "Why is Kentou yelling?"

"How did Yulie manage to sleep with Kentou's big mouth flapping?" Sage whispered. Ryo shook his head. "I have no idea," he whispered back.

Mia stopped the car. "That's it!" she yelled at Kentou. "Either you shut up or I'm leaving you here on the side of the road! I can't drive with this racket!"

"But Mia..." Kentou whimpered.

Mia glared at Kentou, who shuddered and cowered behind Ryo.

"I have an idea, Mia..." Rowan said, as Ryo tried to shake himself free from Kentou's grip.

Five minutes later:

"Hey, guys, this isn't fair!"

"Wow, now there's a lot of space, and we haven't even all powered down yet!" Cye exclaimed.

"Good idea, Rowan," Ryo said. "Now I can stretch my legs out."

"What if the roof collapses?" Sage asked as he suspiciously eyed the ceiling of the jeep for signs of structural weakness.

"Guys..." Kentou yelled from outside, strapped to the roof of the jeep.

"Let's power down!" Cye announced. The others nodded.

"Armor of Strata!"

"Armor of Torrent!"

"Armor of Halos!"

"NIJ OAT!"

All armors disappeared and each warrior was now wearing his regular clothes.

"Hey, I can move my arms freely now!" Cye exclaimed.

"Ryo..." Yulie said, tugging on Ryo's shirt.

"Yes, Yulie?"

"Ryo...."

"What is it Yulie?"

"Ryo..."

"Can't you keep that kid quiet, Ryo?" Cye asked as he put cotton in his ears.

"Ryo..." 

"That's definitely a Ryo complex," Rowan commented. He propped his feet up, placed his hands behind his head, and closed his eyes.

"Ryo..."

White Blaze growled. The large one in orange was gone, but he had been replaced with one with an equally annoying noise level. He would definitely have to be eaten. Probably gamy, but...

"Uh, Ryo?" Sage tapped Ryo on the shoulder. "White Blaze has a hungry predator look."

White Blaze rose to his feet.

"Quick, Cye!" Sage yelled. "Grab White Blaze!"

White Blaze crouched and....

*BEEP! BEEP! BEEP, BEEP!*

Will Yulie be eaten? Does Kentou ever get the privilege to ride in the jeep again? And what's beeping? Find out in the next part of The Ronin Warriors' Bustrip. All comments are to be sent to the review box at the bottom of the page. Thanks!


	3. When Vehicle Occupants Collide

Wahoo! And the insanity continues as the Ronin Warriors and Tulpa's Evil Warlords meet up. Strap yourself in and prepare for laughter. Here I go!

***All characters, both Ronin Warriors and Fushigi Yuugi, are **not** my original creations***

Everyone stopped what they were doing. Rowan opened one eye and turned his head to see what the commotion was. Kentou stopped pounding on the roof. Cye and Sage, who had been restraining the white tiger, let go. White Blaze stopped chewing on Yulie's leg. Ryo pried Yulie's fingers from his clothes. All of them looked over out the window to their left.

An old bus that looked like it was ready for the junk yard sped along side them. A Demon Soldier sat in front, steering. Sekhmet and Cale pulled down the windows of the bus. Anubis and Dais joined them. They gave the Ronin Warriors menacing looks. Anubis waved to Ryo. Cale hit Anubis on the head.

"It's the Dynasty!" Mia cried.

Sekhmet and Cale shook their fists at the warriors.

"Prepare yourselves for death, Ronin Rodents!" they cried.

"Again, you refer to us as being furry creatures with tails and large teeth. Can't you think of something original for once?" Rowan asked lazily.

Sekhmet turned red. Those Ronin Warriors wouldn't outsmart him this time. Especially that Rowan, even though his intelligence was higher than the rest...

"That's enough!" Sage yelled. He looked to the sky and shook his fist. "You stupid author, I am the smartest! I am the intelligent one of the group, not Rowan!"

"Aw Sage, just because the author likes me better doesn't mean you have to get all bent out of shape and -- Aggghhhh!"

Sage pulled Rowan into the back of the jeep and started pounding on him. Rowan recovered from the surprise assault and returned with hair pulling. The two continued fighting. 

Inside the bus, Sekhmet seethed with anger. That Rowan always had to best him. He even stole his spotlight in the fanfic and --

Rowan kicked Sage in the shins. Sage bent Rowan's fingers backwards.

Dais put his hands on his hips and tapped his feet. "Weren't we supposed to be fighting the Ronin Warriors?" he asked.

"Hey guys, cut that out!" Ryo said to the two quarreling guys. "We have a Dynasty situation here." He looked at the warlords, who were becoming impatient.

Cale pointed his finger at the warriors in attempt to scare them. "Don't ignore us, Ronin Roden--" he caught himself and remembering what Rowan had said, tried to think of something original. "Don't ignore us, Ronin, uh...Stupids!"

Anubis looked at Cale. "That doesn't flow as nicely as Ronin Rodents."

Sage paused and looked up. His fist stopped in mid-air, two inches away from Rowan's face. Rowan loosened his death grip on Sage's neck and looked over to the bus. Sage glared at the warlords. It grew very silent. Only the low hum of the car and the puttering of the bus was heard.

"ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!" Sage yelled in full battle cry. "I AM NOT STUPID!" He vaulted out the open window of the jeep and onto the bus. Then he started punching the warlords.

"Talk about a lot of pent up rage," Rowan said as he made his way to the front again. He looked in the side mirror and smoothed out his hair, which had been mussed in the fight.

"Let it out Sage, let it out," Ryo said.

"Wow, he's beating the tar out of them and he's not even in his armor!" Cye commented.

"Go Sage! Punch 'em! Hit Tulpa real hard for me! That'll teach him to tell me my armor's evil!" Kentou cried from on top of the jeep.

Sekhmet pulled out his poisoned swords and slashed at Sage. Sage dodged it and jumped back into the jeep. A round of applause was given by the rest of the warriors.

"I didn't know you were so strong," Ryo said, patting Sage on the back.

Rowan grinned. "I bet you feel a lot better now."

"I needed that."

Anubis, who didn't know Sage had already left, raised his hands. "QUAKE WITH FEAR!" he yelled.

Chains shot out into the bus.

"No, you idiot! Not in here!" Tulpa roared. He shocked Anubis with black electricity.

"I'm so sorry, Master!" Anubis cried. He kneeled and kissed Tulpa's feet.

Mia slowed the jeep down.

"We're slowing down. Why are you slowing down, Mia?" asked Cye, stator of the obvious.

She pointed to a sign in front of them. "We're here."

They've finally made it to the Hot Springs! But what will happen once they're there? Stay tuned for more!


	4. Arriving In One Piece

Here, I make my first appearance in this story. Have at it!

***yes, I know, everything's copyrighted and nothing belongs to me except my original characters, blah, blah, blah***

The jeep stopped ten feet from the sign.

"Odango-no-Miko's (that's me!) Mount Fuji Hot Springs Resort," Yulie read haltingly.

"Okay, everyone, out of the car!" Cye announced.

The doors opened in the back and out tumbled three sweaty, tired, and cranky young men, a white tiger who had been kicked to the point of almost eating a certain someones, and one certain little boy who was still whining.

Mia stepped out of the jeep, took a deep breath, and sighed in relief. She had managed to survive an eight hour car ride with six of the most annoying people she knew. She looked at Yulie, who was tugging on White Blaze's fur and beating him with a stick. She saw White Blaze's eyes narrow in anger. Didn't that kid have any parents? And didn't those parents care that their child was going on a trip to the mountains with five warriors and a large man eating tiger? Maybe she should call HRS and report a case of child neglect...

Rowan stood outside the jeep. He put his hands on his hips and surveyed the other warriors. Poor guys. They were sweaty and hot because any cold air coming from the A/C had immediately turned stale and warm as soon as it passed the front seats. Too bad the windows had gotten stuck closed when they were only halfway there. A cool breeze swept past Rowan, and only Rowan, tossing his hair out of place. _Actually, it's kind of chilly_, Rowan thought as he watched the other guys collapse from heat exhaustion.

"Get me off of this roof!" Kentou bellowed, breaking the peace, along with several people's eardrums. He wiggled, eager to get off the roof and into that bag of food that Rowan had been holding hostage in the front seat...

Suddenly the Dynasty bus came up from behind them. It flew past the warriors and crashed into the sign. The door of the now totaled bus opened and two Demon Soldiers stumbled out like drunken idiots. They crashed to the ground, blocking the path of anyone who exited the bus.

The Warlords were next to exit the bus. Cale tripped over the soldiers laying on the ground and cursed, holding his stubbed toe and hopping on one foot. Dais laughed at Cale, then got stuck in the door, forgetting his armor was too wide. Sekhmet pushed Dais out the way and rammed his forehead into the top of the door frame, his legs being just a couple of inches too long for his head to safely clear the door frame. he ducked and stepped off the bus, rubbing at the large bump that was forming on his noggin. Anubis jumped out of the bus window and hugged Ryo.

"Ryo!" Anubis yelled a little too eagerly. Everyone gave him a strange look.

"Anubis, get off me!" You're making a scene!" Ryo whispered angrily.

"Ahemmm....." Anubis let go of Ryo and cleared his throat. He suddenly became very interested in the color and texture of the bark on a nearby tree.

"Fruitcake," Sage commented.

"Definitely a fairy," Rowan added.

Ryo inspected the Dynasty's smashed bus. "It's pretty busted," he said. "I don't think it'll run anymore."

"Keep your opinions to yourself!" Sekhmet growled.

"Yeah!" Cale interjected. "You and your jeep the size of a shoebox!"

"Makes you wonder which side the author likes better, doesn't it?" Dais asked smugly.

"Yeah, us," Rowan said. "Our jeep's still in one piece." He grinned.

Sekhmet glared at Rowan and vowed to humiliate him in some way, even if it took him the rest of his life.

"Besides," Rowan added, "the author couldn't let such a great warrior like me get in a crappy car..."

"Rowan..." Sage raised his voice in a threatening manner, knowing full well that he too deserved a main character spot.

"...Or Sage either, since we're such great warriors," Rowan finished, successfully covering his small blunder with a skill only the warrior of strata could do.

Dais's face became red and he punched the bus in frustration. One of the doors fell off.

Yulie blinked. "Ryo..." he began, tugging on Ryo's sleeve.

"NO! Not again!" all the other characters cried. "This scene already happened. Once is enough!"

"What, Yulie?" Ryo asked, exasperated at the current situation.

"I sense something is wrong!" Yulie said.

"Don't your parents want you?" Cye asked suddenly, finally coming to the same conclusion Mia had come to earlier.

"Didn't you read the author's rough draft of this story?" Yulie asked.

"How did you get your hands on the rough draft of the author's story?" Mia questioned.

"YES, HOW DID YOU GET THE ROUGH DRAFT OF MY STORY?" the author's voice boomed. Everyone cringed.

"Everyone, get back in your vehicles!" Yulie exclaimed.

"Why should we listen to you?" Cale growled.

"He's right," Rowan agreed. "I reviewed the final draft."

"Shut up, arrow boy," Sekhmet snapped.

"Ooooh, I'm scared now," Rowan taunted. "What are you going to do, gas me to death?"

"Can we just move on with this story?" Sage sighed.

"Quickly, everyone, get changed," Mia said as the warriors and warlords climbed back into their respective vehicles.


	5. Sparkling Gowns (Pretty in Pink)

"Do you think pink is my color?" Cye asked Kentou.

Kentou shrugged. "I dunno. You don't think I look too fat in this dress, do you?"

Cye and Kentou stood in front of a full length mirror, inspecting their dress. Literally, inspecting their dresses. Cye wore a pink party dress and Kentou was in a long green evening gown. Cye looked pretty; Kentou just looked like a large watermelon.

Beside them, Sage and Rowan were looking through the dresses provided and grimacing.

"Do we really have to wear these things?" Sage asked, as he eyed a very revealing dress with suspicion.

Rowan looked at the two standing by the mirror. "Kentou and Cye already have their dresses on."

"Well, we already know that those two are...different from the rest of us," Sage replied, trying to get his point across tactfully.

"I guess we have to do this if we want to get in to the resort," Rowan sighed. "Besides, I'm looking forward to drowning a certain someone." He glanced over to the smashed bus and grinned. It was so easy humiliating Sekhmet.

Sage picked two dresses at random and tossed one to Rowan. "Here. The faster we do this, the faster we get it done." Rowan nodded in agreement.

Over in the bus, there were some slight disagreements.

"Cale, that was my dress!" Anubis whined. Then he spotted a sparkly gown in the corner. "Oooh, pretty!" he said as he picked it up.

Dais knocked Anubis in the head. "Get your grimy paws off my dress!" he cried, pulling the shining gown towards him.

"Are we expected to know how to wear this?" Sekhmet asked warily, holding up a yellow sundress.

"Those flaming Ronin Warriors already have their dresses on," Cale commented as he looked out the window.

"Maybe they have a better selection," Anubis said as he tried to climb out the bus. "I'll go find out!" 

Sekhmet pulled Anubis back in and punched him, knocking the sense back into him.

"Where is Master Tulpa?" Dais asked, looking around the bus.

"That weenie," Sekhmet growled. "He always disappears and leaves the dirty work to us."

Yes, I know this one was short, but the next part is longer, and I was trying to cut it up a little bit. More coming soon!


	6. The Invitation Says What?! (aka. Ryo the...

Meanwhile, back at the jeep:

I guess I can put up with this for a little while..." Rowan said. He looked at himself in the mirror. He ran his hand through his hair.

Sage looked at Rowan and sighed. _What's with the hair? I'm the one who's achieved the hair-over-the-eyes look._

"Hey guys! Come on!" Mia cried. "We all know you're beautiful, but if you don't hurry up, we'll be late!"

Cye, Kentou, Rowan, and Sage gathered at the front, where the sign, if it had not been run into, would have been.

"Actually, I don't mind wearing this. It's kind of comfortable..." Cye began.

"Did we ask you?" Rowan asked sarcastically.

"Did you say something?" Cye asked, raising his fist.

Rowan raised his hands in surrender.

Yulie walked up, wearing a blue jumper. "Where's Ryo?" he asked.

Everyone looked around. "He probably chickened out," Sage commented.

Mia looked at the group. "Does everyone have their make-up on? ("I prefer the au natural look," Rowan whispered to Sage, who nodded in agreement.) Good. If you need any help with anything, ask me. And--Kentou! Stop eating the chapstick! I know it smells good, but really...

"Look! It's the warlords!" Yulie cried.

The four warlords got off the bus, with some difficulty. Cale wobbled, his four inch high stilettos a little too high for his taste. Dais tripped over Cale's train, then tripped over his own hem. Only Anubis was walking with ease.

"Definitely a fairy," Rowan whispered. Sage nodded.

Sekhmet walked out last. He scanned the Ronin Warriors, then stopped on Rowan. "No fair!" he yelled. "You always have to best me!"

"What's the dummy talking about now?" Rowan asked.

Sage pointed to Sekhmet's dress. "I think he means what you're wearing."

Rowan looked at his dress, then at Sekhmet's. Come to think of it, they did look similar...

"It's the same dress!" Sekhmet cried out in dismay.

"And I have to say, I do look better," Rowan said. "Sekhmet has those weird bumps and lines on his..."

"I think they call it fat," Sage said.

Rowan laughed. "Hey Sekhmet!" He yelled. "Have any trouble getting in your dress? Mine is a little big!"

Sekhmet's blood boiled. He growled. So what if his 22 triple X was just a tad bit too small? Rowan had no right to make fun of his figure like that...

"Ryo!" Yulie cried, announcing the warrior's arrival.

Everyone looked at Ryo, then gasped.

Rowan started laughing. Sage joined in, unable to stifle his laughter. Cye and Kentou had amused looks on their faces. Even the warlords were grinning.

"Yeah, well, I couldn't find anything in my size..."

"That's an understatement!" 

Ryo glared at Sage. "...everything was too short. And the sleeves didn't fit right, so I had to rip them off..."

Mia looked at Ryo. Poor guy. He'd managed to turn himself into an interesting looking hobo-clown. The small red dress he was wearing with the ripped off sleeves ended at his waist, revealing blue and yellow boxers. Good thing she didn't like him anymore. Then she might feel bad...

"...and I didn't know how to put on my make-up..." Ryo continued.

Ryo's cheeks were two bright pink circles of blush, his lipstick was smeared all over his face, and it was very obvious he had applied concealer.

Ryo looked around. "Hey, White Blaze!" he called out. He walked over to the tiger.

White Blaze's hair stood on end. He growled menacingly. What the hell was Ryo wearing? Maybe it was some sort of disease in which case he better not get close...

Ryo held out his hand, and White Blaze bared his teeth. He growled again, and jumped back into the jeep, locking the doors.

"Welcome to Odango-no-Miko's Mt. Fuji Hot Springs Resort," a female voice called out. Everyone turned to meet the voice.

A girl in a light purple kimono appeared. Her dark hair was in two buns, one on each side of her head. 

"I am Odango no Miko--"

"A dumpling priestess?!" Kentou cried. "Does this mean food? When do I get to eat dumplings?"

The girl stared at Kentou with her eye of death at Kentou's interruption. Kentou became very quiet. The girl then turned back to the group, smiling brightly.

"...and I hope you all enjoy my resort. Just for today, I have closed the resort, so the all female, no males allowed rule does not apply...why are you all wearing dresses?"

Cale pulled out the invitation. "Geez, I didn't read the small print!" He squinted his eyes. "And boy is it small! I can just make it out. It says..."

"...the resort will be closed to regular customers for this day. The no males allowed rule does not apply for this day..." Cye read.

"And you didn't read this either?" Ryo yelled at Cye.

Cye grinned sheepishly.

"You wanted to dress up and pretend to be women, didn't you!" Sage accused.

"Why'd you have to drag us into this too?" Rowan said as he pulled off his dress, his regular clothes on underneath. Sage did the same.

"Just because you have a sick mind doesn't mean that we do!" Ryo exclaimed as he too pulled off his dress. He wiped his make-up off on it.

"No, no! Guys! You got it all wrong! It was, uh...Kentou's idea!"

"KENTOU!" the three warriors exclaimed.

"Cye lies!" Kentou cried. He tackled Cye.

"Cale, you nincompoop! Next time, wear your glasses!" Dais said.

"But they make me look dorky..." Cale whined.

Sekhmet growled. "That dress make you look dorky!"

"Look who's talking!" Anubis laughed.

The warlords looked at each other. Then they pulled off their dresses, revealing their armor. Pulling out their weapons, they attacked each other.

Mia, Yulie, Ryo, Sage, and Rowan looked at the fighting warlords, the quarreling warriors, then shrugged. 

"If you are ready for a relaxing day, please follow me,"" The priestess turned and walked to the main building. The five followed.

Suddenly the priestess stopped and turned, pulling out from gods knows where a diamond fan (belonging to a certain red-headed character ^_^). "Wait." She nodded to the rules sign, then looked at Yulie.

"No one under the age of 10 (I really don't know how old Yulie is, sorry!) will be admitted. But Mia..." Yulie tugged on Mia's jacket, "I really wanted to go to the springs!"

"Can't have anyone drowning, you know," the priestess said holding the fan like a mobster would a heavy metal pipe.

"Come on, Yulie, I'll take you back to the car," Mia said, pulling him back to the jeep. She banged on the window. "White Blaze, let us in."

Several minutes passed. "WHITE BLAZE, LET US IN!" Mia was beginning to look frazzled. 

The priestess sighed. "Well, I can't wait all day," she said. Throwing the fan over her shoulder, she walked back into the resort. 

"Well?" Sage asked. Rowan and Ryo looked at each other, shrugging. 

The three warriors: wildfire, halos, and strata, walked into the resort, grinning.

THE END!

Finally! *throws a party, in which everyone's invited* And so ends the emotional last episode of the Ronin Warriors' Bustrip to the Mt. Fuji Hot Springs Resort, owned by me, Odango no Miko (dumplingpriestess). I hope you all enjoyed it. I know I had fun writing it. Thank you for all your reviews! (If you haven't reviewed yet, please do so now *wide eye innocent blink*) Much appreciated! Also, please read my other stories if you liked this one!

Megan (dumplingpriestess)


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